The Covid Diaries

Each day begins fairly much the same.

Up at around 7:30 each morning, as Peanut impatiently meows and rubs his head against me to let me know it is feeding time at the zoo.

When I swing my legs over the side of the bed, Peanut immediately gives me a lovely footrub, and it is divine.

I forgive the annoyingness of his urging me to get up.

I remember to be grateful that I have him and the others to get up for.

After they are fed and watered, it is coffee time for me!

I start the Keurig, and as it is prepping my much anticipated cup of java, I open all the shutters.

It is a cloudy day today, and the wind is starting to pick up.

The buds on the tree are showing some promise, but they are not quite ready to open fully just yet.

They don’t trust Mother Nature.

She has been a fickle mistress this Spring.

The month of March seemed more Spring-like than the current month of April.

We have seen several snow squalls in the past few weeks.

The plants and animals are not quite sure what to make of it

And so they patiently wait.

Much like all of us are doing during this Covid-19 pandemic that has everyone, around the world, staying home and trying to stop the spread.

For the sixth week, I have nowhere to go and no place to be.

All of my appointments, visits, volunteer shifts, work gigs, all crossed out in my daytimer with the word “Covid” beside them.

It feels like six weeks going on six years.

A daily walk in the warming weather is a saving grace.

All the while physically distancing from other walkers of course.

A daily trip to the barn to give my horse his medicine is also a highlight. One that has literally saved my day.

I have kept to routine – showering, getting dressed, albeit into “around the house” clothes as I like to call my yoga pants and hoodie, keeping in the loop for work, reading for pleasure, and eating.

Oh, the eating.

Trying to keep to my normal food intake is a challenge.

Yesterday I polished off a half a bag of potato chips.

I am paying for it today on the scales.

Even that 45-minute walk is not enough to make up for the extra carbohydrates that I seem to find myself craving.

The extra slice of bread smothered with margarine and jam.

The raisin tea biscuits that are also better smothered with margarine and jam.

And the cheese buns which are so much tastier smothered with margarine.

I think margarine has become my go-to food group.

I am afraid to wash my jeans for fear I won’t be able to get into them once they come out the dryer.

Hopefully soon it will be warm enough to set aside my long johns for the season, and that will give me a few more millimetres space.

And the dreams – oh the dreams.

So vivid, so colourful.

And I am so glad I am not alone.

This Covid Crisis is wreaking havoc not only on our physical health and the economy, but our mental health too.

I must admit I feel a slight sense of despair that things will not be the same again.

I actually look forward to “Grocery Day” each week, an excuse to be un-house bound and procure supplies.

I think everyone is becoming a little stir-crazy.

In my line of business, as a realtor, one can only do so much at home and online.

With open houses prohibited, and showings limited, we are all feeling our hands are tied, even though thankfully being deemed an essential service.

Kudos to my brokerage which is always finding new ways to bring us webinars and videos that keep us connected, informed, entertained and educated.

I feel for all of the businesses that have been deemed non-essential: restaurants, hair dressers, retailers. How are they surviving, shuttered for the foreseeable future?

The government is offering a lot of help. Wage help for workers and businesses affected and rent help for businesses too.

Overall, the days go fairly quickly.

I have begun breaking them down in to 3-hour segments.

The cats are no doubt happy to have me home all day, even though they do sleep most of the time.

I am calling my elderly parents and younger brother more often. It is good to hear their voices, to make sure they are alright.

I am keeping up with housework, the laundry and vaccuuming and sweeping. It actually makes me feel better when I do that.

There is light at the end of the tunnel.

May 12th is the new deadline by the province of Ontario that may see the emergency measures lifted.

I know businesses are waiting with baited breath.

And there will be so many restrictions, which is alright.

We don’t want to have to go through this again.

But in a way, too, it has been a respite. A reprieve. A pause from our frenetic lives. A way to reconnect with home and family. A break from routine. Those are the blessings.

Looking at that big picture, I am loving the break from routine.

Yes it is nice to be needed and wanted and have places to go and things to do and people to see – but this is nice too.

A forced downtime; some “me” time.

I signed up for a couple of online university courses, never thinking how much they would come to mean to have something to read and do and learn.

Some days I have to struggle out of malaise and ennui.

But that’s okay too.

I think the trick is not being too hard on ourselves for not getting things done that we had hoped.

That kind of added pressure is not good for our bodies, mind and soul, which are already feeling less than 100%.

There will be a light at the end of the tunnel, when a vaccine is found, or herd immunity is established, whichever comes first.

Until then, let’s just keep on keepin’ on, holding our heads up, trying to be kind, sticking to a routine, and loving and forgiving ourselves.


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