Anger Management

I have it.
I don’t know anyone who doesn’t have it.
Some people have road rage.
Others have general rage.
I believe I have technology rage.
If my computer or other technological device isn’t working or I can’t figure something out – I would be only too happy to throw it through a window.
I am ashamed to say I have broken a camera and a tablet in anger and frustration because they did not work.
But I have never and would never harm a person or animal.
How does someone’s anger go so unchecked and so unhelped for so long, that a person is able to ultimately kill another human being.
A young boy from an Ontario town is the latest casualty.
He was found near death in the family’s apartment.  He later died at hospital.
The stepfather fled the scene and led police on a chase across the country.
He was finally found and arrested.
He is believed to have so severely injured the boy that he did not survive.
Apparently he was angry about a pending break up.
News stories suggest the man was violent in his relationship too.  There were assaults and rages and vicious fights.
There is no question someone like that would make anyone scared to report anything, for fear of making a person like that more angry, causing more pain and fear.
It is a vicious circle.
But when does enabling such a person to continue acting that way – by not reporting it or not getting help to that person – become the right thing to do.
Anger management is very much a thing now.
A couple of movies, comedies no less, bear the same title.
And a comedy television series also bears the name.
It has been a thing for therapists for decades.
I believe all human beings have some form of anger.
I am sure it was initially a survival mechanism.
To be angry enough to protect, to hunt, to fight for what is right.
But when we turn our anger into a weapon for our own good, that is wrong.
And it is especially wrong when we hurt another creature, be it human or animal.
A man recently threw a pet beagle off a seventh floor apartment balcony to its death.
Another man rammed his vehicle into a police horse in utter rage.
The horse had to be euthanized at the scene.
While it is easy for me to sit here and judge what is right and wrong, in the eyes of the person who is feeling the anger, I am sure they feel their actions are utterly justifiable at the time.
What is it in our nature that causes that switch to flip, to cause us to abandon all traces of empathy and compassion and conscience, all knowledge of what is right and wrong, to see nothing but red and fury and anger and want to cause harm in the belief it will make us feel better.  To the demise of someone or something else.
I think that’s where we, as humans, need to all take a step back and think about what makes us human.
Sure, we are made up of all sorts of emotions, and I am too.
But anger is the scariest of all emotions.
And the emotion that we need to keep in check the most.
To find an outlet for it so that it does not bring harm to others.
To try to cultivate more empathy and compassion, to crowd out the anger.
Like fertilizing a lawn to suffocate the weeds.
And I promise I will do the same.
I acknowledge my technology rage.
And when I feel that anger start to rise out of frustration for a piece of technology that doesn’t work, I will walk away, take a deep breath, and count to ten.
And I hope others will do that too.


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